Starting Over...Again

"Faith is taking the first step when you don't see the whole staircase." -MLK

Here I am moving across the country alone, again. There is always such a catch-22 to starting over and voluntarily trading the familiar for the unknown. It is both extremely terrifying and unexplainably enticing.

The last few days in Dallas completely exposed my fears, doubts, and selective memory in regard to the adventure. I selectively packed away the challenges, loneliness, and difficult lessons from Aspen, and only chose to remember the rainbow & sunshine moments. That was, of course, until I wondered through my empty Dallas apartment and immediately realized those not-so-perfect experiences would soon reappear in NC. The goodbyes quickly became very tearful.

However, starting over forces self-growth and maturity that sparks a reliance on Christ like never before. Fortunately, the rather unpleasant lessons from Aspen make this time much easier: they taught me who I am.

Yes, that sounds silly. Surely by age 24 I should know “who I am”. I did, in theory. But being away from a constant support system brough forth the reality that I am not a PT, a student, an Aggie, a Porch volunteer, or even a blonde haired blue eyed small town Texas girl. Those things may describe me, but my identity is defined by the one who loves me: Christ.

Being in NC for a few days, I’m beginning to settle in quite nicely. So far, despite missing everyone from home, I love it here. The scenery is breathtaking, the people are Texas-friendly, and the weather has been phenomenal. But perhaps the best part of this new beginning is that I’m not trying so hard. I know who I am and that I can trust in the plan of the one who loves me.